The Cycle of Madness

Do you ever have those days (or nights) where you feel as if you’re going crazy?

Most of the time the process is gradual. It starts off with you all cheery. The universe takes one look at you and goes, “Oh hell no”

Guess what’s next: it comes crashing down on ya.
It’s a feeling impossible to describe. It feels like the air’s being pulled from your lungs, yet you’re still alive to feel the pain. Everyone sees you, thinks you’re alright, and doesn’t spare a second thought.

What can you do except surrender?

When there’s nothing you can do to make it feel better, no one to turn or talk to, that’s when the madness starts. The things that once terrified you are what you want to do most. Serial killers sound like teddy bears, and homicide like child’s play.

And you want nothing more than to pull the plug. But not on your life, of course. You don’t deserve to die. You want to end the lives of every single measly human that contributed to your misery.

And as morbid as that sounds, you can’t say you haven’t been there before. Stay in denial if you want.

We all want the same thing. We all wonder whether doing that would somehow make things better.

But for the time being, you just wallow in your madness. Allowing it to simmer, boil, and explode… until you become a sobbing mess. You cry until your face is hot, you’re eyes are bloodshot and you really can’t breathe. And usually, the madness passes. Until the next wave hits, that is.
And the cycle continues.

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